In this episode KC, Chris, Tash, Leisha, Shelby, Nicole and E. Green (from the Hip Hop Digest Show) discuss Erykah Badu and long skirts, having conversations with men, the evolution of women and raising kids with changing gender roles.
Music: Mikos Da Gawd – Love
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A lot of women and men have the tendency to put the own-ness on the person that is the victim of violence / assault. I understand that we as women should protect or selves or dress “appropriately, but lets be real. There are parents shopping for their daughters encouraging them to look more like Nicki Minaj and kids can always change their clothes when they get to school. I am the first person looking at 9 year olds, or 15 year olds smh that their skirt is too short, too tight.
But that doesn’t mean that they are now to be blamed for what could happen to them or teachers being attracted to them.
I know a man also that said that when he goes to his daughter’s school, he thought some of the students were teachers, because they look “grown”. This is really just an excuse to lust after young girls. It is apparent to me that many of these girls are very young by the way they interact with other young girls, the way they interact with adult women and men and the conversations that they have. Pay attention men and be honest with yourselves. Does the girl really look or seem all that grown to you or are you afraid to admit that you are attracted to a 16 year old as a 30 or 40 year old man and do something about it?
Additionally, Everyone has a different definition of what is “appropriate to wear for kids, for work, for outings. Lets just behave appropriately as human beings and not harass, or assault women and men no matter what they have on.
Thank you for the feedback Blessed.
Our society does a lot of victim blaming. I believe its easier than trying to correct the behavior of the attacker, which is the bigger problem. We don’t stress teaching “appropriate behavior”. Many pick up these bad habits from home or their environment.
As Nicole stated on the show, there is a natural attraction between men and women of child bearing age. If a man notices a young girl who looks “grown”, it doesn’t mean he’s lusting after her. The problem is if he chooses to act on those feelings and approach the girl as if she is an adult women. We can’t ignore the fact that in this country many young girls have bodies that develop faster than their age. That is probably a major challenge to handle as a young girl. Yes, the will still talk and act like a child. But they may not look like a child, and unfortunately many men will ignore those signs and react based only on our visual senses.
We have to continue to educate both sides. Teach men/women that assault and violence is wrong in all forms AND how to protect yourself and try to decrease the chances of becoming a victim.